7 Stages Of Online Dating (Part 1)
So, you've just put up a profile on some online dating or social networking site. Or maybe you've been online for awhile now, and you think you know the ropes pretty good, right?
I'm going to enlighten you on what both sexes have to worry about online and what both sexes have to go thru so you know the truth for once! For one of the online dating guide books I'm writing for guys, I have, for the last 2 years, been on about 35 different dating websites meeting and getting to know women and discovering the true art of online dating or online meeting people.
What I have learned about men and women is equivalent to a Ph.D. from Harvard on human behavior, sexuality, and psychology.
The biggest things ALL guys have to worry about are women using fake pictures that aren't them and lying about their age online - usually they're older than they say. (Note: The 3 things women lie about the most offline is their real age, weight, and dress size.)
The biggest thing women have to worry about guys online is they're married or have a girlfriend, outdated pictures, and of course their own personal safety. (Note: The 3 things guys lie about the most offline is how much they really make, how big their penis is, and how long they can last in bed.) If a guy says he makes $40K, a FedEx driver, says he has an average size thingy, and can last about 15 minutes, he's probably telling you the truth ladies!
1/2 of all single Americans are now or have been online dating. Why you ask?
Because the bar, nightclub and dating scene just gets old eventually. Maybe it takes you until you're 25, 30, 35, maybe 40 years old, but it will eventually get old believe me. It's not so much in going out and partying that gets old, but more looking and hoping to meet some hot and great person that you want to date, hook up with, or marry down the road.
Having to hear the same drunk meatheads hit on you or grab you. Or for guys look around and see the same unappealing women out and about The intelligent single person of the 21st century also knows it's a numbers game. (I don't mean sleeping around or trying to get a lot of action either for all you players and playettes.
Ladies, you have all heard you have to kiss a lot of toads to find your prince, right? Well, online you can kiss hundreds maybe even a thousand times more toads in a tenth of the time you ever could offline.
I personally know within minutes of reading most profiles, if any woman has a chance or not with me to go to the next levels. I will explain in greater detail in a few moments. From just talking on the phone or IMing with a woman for an hour or so, I can tell if there is some good chemistry or any kind of anything in the future.
I have just honed in on my "Spidey Senses" so much now, and I don't want to waste even a minute of my time or another person's if I don't think anything will ever come of it. This is not rude or mean at all. It's the right and honest thing to do I believe.
You're not leading on someone, wasting their time, or setting them up to really get their feelings hurt. Too much of that crap happening already without you contributing to it with all the heartless, selfish, ungiving, and cheating people in the world today and online.
What are the 7 stages of online dating and what happens in each stage?
Stage 1
In this stage someone winks at you, shows interests in you by posting a comment on your profile, or invites you to their network of friends. Whatever dating site you're on, they all have similar type features.
What does this stage mean? Not a whole lot. The person obviously didn't think enough of you or at least not yet to actually take the time and email you. So in our ADD/lazy ass society we just click a button or two to let you know we checked out your profile (Usually that's a lie. They saw your pictures and then on a purely physically based decision they contacted you because of that).
Then, we hope the other person sees that we commented or invited them to our network and they make the next move back or take it to the next stage - to email you. Basically the person is trolling the whole ocean looking for a few bites and thinking even a broken watch is right twice a day!
Sound familiar?
Stage 2
In this stage, someone actually thought enough of your pictures and/or profile to take the time to email you their opinions, curiosity, or interest in you using your dating sites email account. This is the safe, secure way because you're not letting that person into your life at all, and they can only contact you thru that dating site; not your personal email account that you only share with friends, family, business associates, or people you trust at least a little.
What does this stage mean? Well, the person took the time out of their day to email you something which is a good thing sometimes and shows their level of interest is now past stage 1. The email could be something crude, lude, sexual, sweet, nice, funny, romantic, flattering, etc. so the jury's out on whether what they send you is a good or bad thing.
But unlike a posted comment or invite many people will at least reply back to someone's email that took the time to email them, so if you want to get to know someone I would do this stage for sure.
Stage 3
In this stage, mutual cooperation is usually needed because you exchange (or one of you gives the other) you're personal email address. Unless of course the person has their personal email address, which most sites block from showing if you try but some people put their personal email addresses on their site so you can contact directly that way.
What does this stage mean? Well, you just let them into your little world a tad bit. Now you can exchange pictures with each other as well as use emoticons and different font styles to get your email message to them more convincingly. That person also, with very little effort, can track down where your internet connection is coming from meaning city/state.
It's a good thing to find out to see if someone's lying about where they live or bad if you don't want to give out the city/state of where you live for safety reasons if you're like a porn star, model, or someone in the media and would be prone to get whacko's and stalker types.
Keep a look out for Part 2, with further explanations of stages 4-7 about online dating.
Passionate Ben is an online dating researcher who has been on more online dating websites than ANYONE in the world. 35 different dating websites! Ben bridges the gap with his online radio talk show, infamous blogs, public speaking, and future books in an unconventional, funny, and common sense approach. For a limited time you can download the FREE report called, Open Your Eyes Already About Online Dating at http://www.passionateben.com
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